Past Interviews:

So Cal Slyme
Plattsburgh Champs
Chicago Black Sox
New Milford Blazers
Queensboro Kings
Minneapolis Haymakers
Madison Fighting Mimes
Salem Cowtippers
Los Altos Undertakers
Cleveland Rocks
Stamford Zoots

August 24, 2000
by "Biggest Daddy"

Disclaimer: There is a common misperception that "Biggest Daddy" is Commissioner Glander.  This is not true.  Biggest Daddy is an owner in the BDBL who, for good reason, wishes to remain anonymous.  The BDBL and Commissioner Glander are not responsible in any way for comments or questions posed by Biggest Daddy.

Interview with Chris Luhning, Kansas Law Dogs

BIGGEST DADDY: Your logo looks like a toilet seat I might buy at a truck stop; where did you find it?

CHRIS LUHNING: The logo was developed by Mr. Brett. He claimed to have taken a couple of
art classes in college and thought he could save a few bucks. Little did he know that the Law Dog logo would become so popular. The latest numbers show Law Dog apparel a close second behind the Cleveland Rocks. Although we feel that we are number one, since most of the Rocks sales are from "The Drew Carey Show".

BD: Do you have any pre-game rituals? Sacrificing small animals? Eating chicken?

CL: We don't believe in rituals. We just go out and play the game we love.

BD: What does a Law Dog do with its spare time?

CL: Hold'em Poker...Diamond Mind Baseball is a close second.

BD: Calvin Pickering: Mo Vaughn or Sam Horn? What happened to Cal?

CL: I'm not sure what happened to big Cal, but I'll take a couple of cases of Bud from anyone interested.

BD: What will the lineup for the 2001 Law Dogs look like?

CL: I think we could have had a great lineup, but Beltran and Clark will hold us back. I think we'll have to make a few moves during the off-season. We're looking to replace Clark at 1B. We're hoping to draw some interest from Travis Fryman or Mike Lamb who are both having great seasons. Here is what I'm projecting at this time:

1. Womack, SS
2. Drew/Beltran, CF
3. Gonzalez, LF
4. Dye, RF
5. Glaus, 3B
6. Clark (free agent or trade), 1B
7. Boone, 2B
8. Flaherty/Estalella, C
9. Pitcher

BD: Paul Shuey has given up 19 homers in 49 innings. Do your pitchers ever complain about your softball stadium masquerading as a baseball stadium?

CL: We thought the ball would carry here in Kansas, but we had no idea it would be like this. The fans love it...and that's all that matters. More people in the stands means more money to spend. Do we really care what those cry baby pitchers think? When they start playing every day instead of once or twice a week then we'll listen.

BD: Buck Martinez gave you an A+ as a GM. Any comments? What other GM's in the league would you hire to be your assistant?

CL: I have a lot of respect for Buck and I appreciate the vote of confidence.  We try to put a good product on the field for the fans, while trying to make a few bucks too. It's a win/win situation. For the other GM's, I really don't know. I just hope they're enjoying this crazy hobby as much as I am.

BD: Will the Law Dogs make the playoffs this year?   If so, how far will they go?

CL: It will be close, but I think we'll fall short.

BD: Will the Royals actually be a team to beat in a few years as Commish Glander claims?

CL: The Royals should be very good, very soon. I think what we're really missing is an experienced catcher (Jim Sundberg/Bob Boone). These guys took our young pitchers of the 80's (Sabes/Gooby/Black/Jackson) and gave them the confidence they needed. I'm really not sure if there is a catcher out there like that anymore, but if there is would you give him Mr. Glass's phone number.